Couch Potatoes Successfully Grown

One of the more interesting things we had at the Saturday Plant Swap was some couch potatoes. Many Islanders do not have the time and inspiration to grow them, since most folks are so active running about, but this was like "cold fusion." Anyway, it turns out that couch potatoes are fairly easy to grow, with the major ingredient being of course a couch. They do not require sunlight, other than some exposure to the television rays. We don't water ours, although the occassional spill from a drink seems to be followed by a major growth spurt. Fertilizer seems to only be crumbs from bags of chips, Cheetos, dust balls, and stuff like that.

An analysis by the urban foresters from Weslaco and Brownsville revealed that couch potatoes are not edible, although pretty darned neat. You just throw a couple of these honeys under the couch and watch 'em grow! With American's lazy habits and slovenly eating habits, and if the potato was engineered to be edible, the potential could be limitless. Note that these are actually climbing vines, so be careful they don't grow all over you.

To actually discover the couch potato on South Padre was fairly remarkable, since like I said most folks are furiously running about, travelling, getting exersize, and raising money for this week's fundraiser. Perhaps the jungle-like humidity has something to do with it. I'd like to name the new species "Couch bulbifera americanus boobus" although perhaps a tribute to South Padre Island would be more in order.

[Editor's Note: Sam, those are the air potato, the cinnamon vine or 'Dioscorea bulbifera.' They belong to the tropical yam family. Thanks to the folks that brought them to the plant show.]